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Love you long time!

February 24, 2010

Sorry i’ve been away fellow bloggers!  It’s been a manic few weeks that involved such strangeness as an electrode facial; free hypnosis; a burping Chinese woman; Lebanese wine; and an Arab with a dog in a basque. No really, i’m not making it up.

With my last week off before the start of le job, I decide to make the most of it and pampered myself with a few crazy treatments designed to help you lose weight or kickstart a diet (i’m on one in preparation for another stint as a bridesmaid to a dear childhood friend of mine) – the other bridesmaids are veritable Cheryl Cole lookalikes. I am not. I get all these things free cos I do some reviewing for a London culture website so it fits neatly under the ‘work’ bracket.

So, first up was the electro facial, which did some wierd shit with an electronic pen thing to open your pores allowing some hardcore cream to ‘penetrate deep’ (ahem) in to your skin. It was very strange, but it darn well worked and several people commented on the amazingness of my shiny shiny complexion. Score.

Then came the Weight Loss hypnosis, designed to literally tell you to eat less, and then you will. Jury is still out on its effectiveness, (and I have another session to come anyway), but I certainly seem to have eaten less…watch this space.

I then tried out a QI treatment – a Chinese thing that centres around acupressure and energy, designed to identify areas where your body is weak and improve your energy levels. So far, so alternative, but not insane. That was until my therapist lady Dr Kim started burping and moaning as she massaged my shoulder. It’s supposed to be a bit like that bit in The Green Mile when he saves the guard’s wife, but honestly, it was very strange – and i’m not sure what good it did except to tell me I was bloated (I knew that) and that my shoulder was sore. (I knew that too, Dr Kim had been stabbing at it for the last ten minutes.)

So onto the Lebanese wine – which I had with Yorkshire Boy when we went out on Friday to celebrate the onset of Fulltime Employment. We headed to London Bridge to an oyster bar and enjoyed oysters, prawns, whitebait, hake and sole. All delicious. And it was nice to see  YB relaxed after his skiing adventure, enjoying some nice vino and going all decadent for once.  He worries about money too much, I don’t worry about it enough.

Then Saturday came and YB and I headed to an army barracks in Cambridge to see a recently-returned-from-Afghanistan friend of ours and his fiance. As with all things army a party was in order and dressing up was compulsory – we had to go as something beginning with ATRorB (Don’t ask).

So, anyway, YB thinks dressing up is actually a genuine form of torture, inflicted on those who don’t have a penchant being the centre of attention, but was eventually  persuaded to dress up on the proviso he could borrow his mate’s Top Gun outfit. Which was all well and good till we discoverd it was ripped down one leg and across the crotch. Cue a handy stapler and some rather nervous directions from YB as I attempted to wield a stapler and an unstready hand in that most important of areas. I went as the colour Red – though it still seemed to confuse one girl, dressed as a turtle, who asked me if I was WonderWoman. I think it may have been a chat up line. She was – rather – errrm, army, if you will.

So, it was at this party we then met an officer dressed as Arab, accompanied by his new labrador puppy wearing a rather fetching pink corset. She was a Burlesque dog. Genius. YB looked like he’d died and gone to heaven and spent the rest of the evening having  giddy conversations with the frankly disinstered mutt, while the rest of us played the cereal box game and quoffed much wine. Same old Saturday night out then.

One Comment leave one →
  1. February 24, 2010 3:57 pm

    What interesting sounding treatments! I have been dying to get a massage and facial, too bad it’s not free for me!

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